NaNoWriMo-untitled novel-chapter three

*chapter four will also be posted tonight, and maybe even chapter five. :) leave comments please.*

Ed’s was just as I remembered. It was the same dull gray peeling paint, the same worn sign, the same low prices. I pulled my gleaming Mercedes into the parking lot and into a space between a red Chevy pickup and a beat up old Honda Accord.
Mom struggled out of the depth of the Mercedes and I took a deep breath as we rounded the front of the store to go in. A small group of older men were clustered in the ancient rocking stairs around the entrance and a man about my age sat strumming his guitar. Small town life at its best on a Friday morning. The younger man looked up at me, and I thought I recognized him from somewhere, but pushed that thought aside behind me as we entered the store.
The same Ed’s appeared in front of my eyes as I took in the old rickety shelves, brimming with food. She grabbed a cart and started off full tilt, as always. I followed behind, helping her get the things off high shelves and bending low to grab the last box if Cheerios. It was a system between the two of us and we didn’t need words to function as a unit. We saw a few morning shoppers as we traveled down the aisles, packing our cart to the fullest extent. It wasn’t until we were waiting to check out that someone addressed me directly.
“Madeline, is that you?” I turned and my eyes found his. It was the man from on the porch, only now he was wearing the green apron all employees of Ed’s wore.
“Yes?”
“I don’t think you would remember me. I’m Noah, I was in your English class your senior year.” Now his face clicked in my memory. Noah had sat behind me all year and I never gave him the time of day.
“How have you been Noah?” I smiled and turned towards him as the cashier rung up our purchase. Noah moved to bag our items as he responded.
“Good, keeping busy I guess. How long will you be in town for?” My mother turned quickly to hear my answer.
“I’ll be here for awhile.”
“We’ll have to get together sometime, talk and rehash the golden days.” I smiled as he put the last bag in our cart.
“We’ll do that. I’m staying with my mom.” She smiled.
“It’s good to see you again Mrs. Harris. Take good care of our Maddie.”
“I will Noah.” She patted his shoulder as I took control of the cart and steered it past him, trying not to show emotion.
I made her sit in the car while I put the groceries in the trunk and tried to hold in tears. No one had ever called me Maddie, except for Justin.

I was barely sixteen when Justin and I started dating. It was my junior year that I finally had a boyfriend and Justin quickly became everything to me. We were inseparable.
It had been a cool fall day when he told me he loved me. He had blindfolded me, packed me into his car and off we went. The car had stopped and he led me along a leaf lined path. When he took the scarf off my eyes, a red blanket sat among the orange and yellows of the fallen leaves. A picnic basket sat and candles glowed.
“What’s all this?” He smiled and pulled me close to him, the brisk wind whipping my brown hair into his face.
“I thought you might like to have a picnic with me, before it gets to cold.” He kissed me, then sat me down next to him on the warm blanket,
We had sparkling cider, and fried chicken, potato salad and everything we would have as if it were a warm summer afternoon, instead of a cold fall evening. As night fell, he blew out the candles and we lay side by side, watching the stars move slowly across the sky. He grabbed my hand and rubbed my palm with his thumb, in small intricate circles until that patch of skin fell numb.
“You’re beautiful.” He rolled over so he was looking down on me.
“No one has ever said that before.” I smiled and kissed his cheek clumsily.
“Did you ever think you could be this happy?” His face looked so hard and set, then softened.
“No, happiness is hard for me.” He pressed his chapped lips to my forehead.
“I know.” He grew silent, just watching me for a while. “Promise me something.”
“Okay.”
“Promise me that when you are with me, you will always be happy.”
“That’s a weird request.” I rubbed my hand down his back and felt the softness of his sweatshirt.
“Just promise.”
“Okay, I promise.” He leaned down and kissed me then. It was my favorite kiss with him. He just held onto me and poured his heart through that kiss. His fingers stroked my face and his hand cupped my cheek. When he finally pulled away, I sighed and smiled.
“I love you Maddie.”
“I love you too Justin.”

As we drove the streets back home, I sat quiet, thinking about Justin. Like my mom, I had left, without any word, without a goodbye.
She sat still next to me, knowing I was thinking about him. I don’t know how she knew that, I just know she did. She had the mom expression on her face, like she was waiting for me to own up to something I did.
“Does he still live here?”
“Who?” She looked at me, a blank expression on her face.
“Mom, you know who I mean.” I shot her a look of my own.
“Yes, he does.” She fell quiet. He would know soon that I was back. Noah or someone else would tell him I was here. Would he come to see me? Or was he full of hate?
“Do you think he hates me?”
“I don’t know.” We were quiet again as we pulled into the driveway. After unloading the bags into the kitchen, she made me sit at the table while she put the food away.
“Do you hate me?” She paused for a minute before continuing. It was a minute before her answer came.
“I could never hate my own flesh and blood. But I am a little angry with you.”
“I know. You should be.” I twisted my hands on the table top and she sat down next to me.
“Why did you leave Madeline?”

It was May of that year when it happened. I remembered sitting in his car, idling in the parking lot of the movie theater. My hands twisted in my lap then, wringing them as I cried. He put his arm around me and held me while he cried with me. This was not part of our plans.
“What are we going to do Maddie?”
“I don’t know.” I cried so hard, wringing my hands apart in my lap, tears dripping off my chin and soaking a wet spot on my jeans.
“Do you want to keep it?” My grabbed my face and turned it towards his.
“I would like too, but I know we can’t honey, we can’t. We’re too young.”
“What do we do then Maddie. We can’t tell anyone.” I sobbed harder as he tried to dry my face.
“I don’t know, I don’t know…”

“Do you want to talk about this now mom?”
“I would. You don’t have to say everything, but at least tell me something.” She looked so pained, asking me. She was so frail. How could I tell her.
“There were so many reasons mom. I don’t know if I can do this right now.” I put my head in my hands, trying not to cry. I could not cry, I could not cry.
“Tell me one, just one honey.”
I couldn't do this, I needed to talk to Justin first.